Tuesday, December 18, 2007

DW: Life Stuff

I watched a wonderful interview with Elizabeth Gilbert the other day. It was Oprah's second installment, entitled, "Why We Can't Get Enough of Eat, Pray, Love." I remember reading it when it was first published, and sent out an email to all of my women friends encouraging, no, demanding that they read it. She said many wise things during the interview, among them, her definition of God: "that which absorbs perfection."

I particularly enjoyed the soulmate conversation. Someone asked her if her husband was her soulmate and she said, "Thank God no--he's my partner. For me, the term soulmate is code for 'infatuation' and that hurls me into this void where I lose myself and become totally focused on the other's needs at the expense of my own. Soulmates are not partners; they come into our lives to inspire change and cause turmoil. My husband is not my soul mate."

I completely agree, as an alumnus of "visits to the void." My husband doesn't cause turmoil, he simply makes my life easier by waking up beside me each day.

I can relate to what Wendy shared in her post about walking through the museum. Sometimes that happens to me, and I have to leave wherever I am at the moment of overwhelm. I was never an official drug addict, but I do have a highly addictive personality, and often believe that I have many active, addictive behaviors. I actually had a dream the other night where I joined a 12-step program. My default setting is usually to be in the past or future. Thankfully my current responsibilities (owning a company) force me to be in the present moment, and sometimes it's a very tight squeeze.

What has helped me maneuver through overwhelm and anxiety (and overwhelming anxiety) is shifting my focus to gratitude. I'm so grateful for so many things. When I'm annoyed by my business partner, I actually stop and remind myself of how incredibly grateful I am that he is who he is and knows what he knows and does all the stuff that I either can't or don't want to do.

After reading many of the postings here, I can't imagine complaining about anything, other than not making enough time to enjoy all of things for which I'm grateful!

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